A Series of Incredible Events
by RockSunner
Summary: An alternate universe story that combines A Series of Unfortunate Events with The Incredibles.
1. Chapter 1, Bad Beginning

An alternate universe story that combines ASOUE with a recent well-known movie. Disclaimer - I don't own any of the characters of either one. 

A Series of Incredible Events

Fourteen-year-old Violet sighed. She was not was not particularly enjoying her day at the beach with her young brother and her other infant sibling. As the eldest of the three children, it seemed she was always being asked to take responsibility for them. This morning, their mother had seemed particularly anxious to get them out of the way. They had decided to go by trolley to the beach, which had very few people on this foggy day.

Violet was trying to amuse herself by skipping rocks across the murky water. She picked up a small, flat stone and threw it as hard as she could with her right hand. Unexpectedly, it disappeared in mid-air without hitting the water at all!

"Dash!" Violet said sharply. "Did you do that?"

"Heh-heh. What?" said her brother Dash, dropping a small, flat stone behind him.

Violet blasted out a small purple force-field ball at Dash, who used his super-speed running ability to dodge easily.

Baby Jack-Jack gurgled with amusement. Unlike his two siblings he had not yet manifested any super-powers. (His mother had once noticed four deep puncture marks in the side of his metal crib, but she had attributed that to a defect in the crib rather than the baby's response to a nightmare.)

If you are interested in stories with happy endings, I suggest that you immediately exit this page and look elsewhere. Few happy things will occur in the lives of the Parr children from this point on. Although they all had charming facial features and possessed super-powers, the Parrs were extremely unlucky and everything that happened to them was rife with misery and despair.

Out of the fog surrounding the beach came striding a man with a sad face and a large nose. The children recognized him as Mr. Rick Poe, a government agent who had helped the family to relocate on several occasions when their father had blown their cover.

"I'm afraid I have bad news for you children," Poe said. "Your parents have both disappeared and your house has burned to the ground. I'm going to have to relocate you with a new guardian."

"No! No! No!" said Dash, rushing up to Poe. "You've got it wrong. Dad is on a business trip."

"Mother went to check up on him," said Violet. "She said he was either in trouble, or he was going to be. Dash and I were going to tag along, but we couldn't find a babysitter for Jack-Jack in time so we changed our minds. I'm sure they're both all right..."

"I doubt it," said Poe glumly. "Your father has a reputation for getting himself into trouble. He's not as strong and fit as he was in his younger days. In any case, the government has to assume the worst when a super's home is suddenly incinerated."

"Our house burned up?" said Dash in a shocked voice. "Our rooms, all our stuff...?"

"Gone," said Poe. "I was going to relocate you again after your father blew his cover at the insurance company and lost his job. I should have done it. An old enemy must have caught up with him."

"Blew his cover?" asked Dash.

"Lost his job?" asked Violet.

"Gaaah?" asked Jack-Jack.

"That happened months ago," said Poe. "You didn't know?"

"No!" Violet and Dash said together, suddenly feeling very shaky.

"Never mind that now," said Poe. "I have to relocate you for your own safety. Budget cuts have reduced funding for our agency, but fortunately there's a wealthy government contractor who is willing to become your guardian."

"Who is it?" asked Dash.

"He bought himself a title from some little European country," said Poe. "Everyone calls him Count Buddy."


	2. Chapter 2, Buddy

Chapter 2

Mr. Poe first drove the Parr children back to their three-bedroom suburban house, now nothing but a ruined, smoking shell. The shock was like a kick in the stomach.

"I could tell you didn't believe me," said Poe morosely. "I had to let you see it for yourselves."

Dash blurred past into the house, looking for anything that might be left. Nothing. His room, Violet's room, his father's private den full of Mr. Incredible posters and trophies... all gone.

Violet walked in slowly, blinking tears from her eyes. She was carrying Jack-Jack, who also began to cry.

"What could have happened?" she wailed. "Dad must have gotten mixed up in something really bad. He just bought two new cars. Where did he get the money if he lost his job?"

Suddenly Dash was at her elbow. He had a bulge of something stuffed under his shirt. "Psst, Violet! I found something. Remember how Mom brought home those new costumes and wouldn't explain them? Remember how we snuck ours out of her bag and hid them under the bed? I found them... and they're as good as new. Fireproof."

"What good is that now?" Violet snapped. "Who cares about costumes?"

"We might need them to help Mom and Dad," said Dash. "Your new costume can turn invisible with you, right? And mine didn't get hot from friction like my regular clothes do when I run."

"Come along, children," called Mr. Poe. "It's time to go meet your new guardian."

"Help me hide them from Poe, Vi," said Dash. "We don't want him to know about them."

Violet took the three costumes and quickly wrapped her invisibility costume around the others. When she concentrated and made her little finger invisible the costume vanished, too. Everything inside it was also shielded from sight.

She tucked her hand and the bundle under Jack-Jack as she carried him back to the car.

"Count Buddy usually lives on his own private island, but he has an old family home in the city. That's where we'll meet him," said Mr. Poe. He turned the car into an older part of the city which was paved in cobblestones.

"Here we are," Poe announced. "Your new home."

The Parr children looked out at the prettiest home on the block, made of well-scrubbed brick, with wide-open windows in which they could see assorted well-tended potted plants. An attractive woman with platinum-blond hair stood in the doorway.

"Hello," she said in a sultry voice, "You must be the children Count Buddy is adopting."

Violet smiled. Maybe things were not going to be quite so bad after all.

"Hi, I'm Violet and this my brother Dash and my baby brother Jack-Jack."

"I'm Justice Mirage," said the woman. "I work in the High Court, among other jobs..."

"So, you live with Count Buddy?" Dash asked.

"No," said Mirage with a sigh. "At the moment we're just neighbors. His house is over there."

The Parr children looked from the home of Justice Mirage to a miserable, dilapidated mansion next door. The place was grimy, sooty and looked like it was about to fall down, especially the tall and dingy tower that sagged to the left. Painted on the front door in white-on-black was a peculiar squashy letter, a large letter "S".

"Oh!" said Jack-Jack, meaning something like "What a terrible place! Let's sleep outdoors."

Poe led them up to the door and knocked. After a pause the door creaked open and the children saw Count Buddy for the first time.

"Hello, hello, hello. I'm your beloved Count Buddy," said the man in a cheerful voice that rang very false. He was quite pudgy and a wild shock of hair stood straight up from his head. He wore white gauntlets and had a long black cape wrapped around him. There was a bright gleam in his eyes.

"Well, I'll leave you to get acquainted," said Poe. "I have to get back to the Agency. There's been a rash of disappearances of supers who were under our protection program and it's making a lot of work for me."

Before the children could ask him anything more about this, Poe rushed back to his car and sped away.

"Come in, come in," said Buddy cheerfully. "I was sooo sorry to hear about your poor parents. I was your father's biggest fan, you know, back in the days when he was Mr. Incredible."

The living room he ushered them into was a filthy mess, with peeling wallpaper and paintings of the letter "S" hung crookedly on the walls.

"Sorry things are in a bit of a state," said Buddy. "I haven't lived here for years, since my parents passed away. It isn't convenient to take you out to the Island yet, so we'll have to make the best of it. I'm sure with a little work you can make it quite homey."

"We won't be here long," Dash said sullenly. "Our parents will come back for us!"

"You think so?" said Buddy with a mocking sneer. "We'll see... Meanwhile, I have a wonderful plan to tell you about."

"What?" asked Violet.

"Gaah gaah?" asked Jack-Jack suspiciously.

"I'm going to become a superhero, and you'll be my sidekicks!" said Count Buddy. He threw back his cape, revealing a superhero costume with a large squashy letter "S" on the chest. "I'm Syndrome!"

"What?" said Violet. "Isn't that against the law?"

"I plan to make my debut when there's a crisis so terrible they'll have to accept me," said Count Buddy.

"How do you know there'll be a terrible crisis?" asked Dash.

"Oh, I'm sure something will come up," said Count Buddy. "The world always needs saving. I will be magnificent... Syndrome and his three sidekicks: SynBoy, SynGirl, and SynTot! Then my reven... I mean my life, will be complete."

"Gaack!" said Jack-Jack, meaning "What horrible sidekick names." The other two children also grimaced.

"What if we don't want to?" demanded Dash, getting ready to run.

Syndrome fired a bright beam from his gauntlet that froze them in place and lifted them into the air.

"That would make me very angry, and I advise you not to make me angry. Your job will be to go into training, to do every little thing that pops into my head while I use my enormous fortune to prepare our grand entrance as supers."

He fired his jet-boots and flew with the children still in tow up the stairs into a dingy bedroom with one bed. With a whip of the beam he flung them to the floor.

"Now get some rest. You have a big day ahead of you tomorrow," said Syndrome.

There was a click as he locked the bedroom door. 


	3. Chapter 3, Box

Chapter 3

Dash started pacing around the small bedroom, gradually moving faster and faster and raising a cloud of dust.

"This is bad... really, really, really bad," he said.

"Urrk!" said Jack-Jack, which meant, "I agree!"

"Calm down," said Violet. "We need to think."

There was a large cardboard box in the corner of the room. It had once contained a refrigerator. Violet turned it on its side and pulled it out into the room so that the opening faced the window.

"Come on, Dash," she coaxed. "Come sit in here for a bit."

"Huh? Why?" said Dash.

"I saw a peephole Count Buddy could use to spy on us in that wall near the door," Violet whispered. "He can't see us this way."

The three children sat inside the box and Violet dropped the invisibility on the bundle of costumes she had brought from their destroyed home.

"I think Dad had these made for us because he knew we might be in danger and we might have to use our powers," Violet said.

"Really?" said Dash with a grin. "I've always wanted to use my speed."

"You already use it," said Violet. "You use it to put thumbtacks on your teacher's chair!"

"Yeah, well you use your power to spy on your boyfriend Quigley, so you can drool all over him," snapped Dash.

"He's not my boyfriend!" said Violet, turning red.

"Yop!" said Jack-Jack, which meant something like, "If we don't get our act together we'll never see the school or our parents again!"

"Jack-Jack's right," said Violet. "We have to have a truce."

"Ok Vi, truce it is," said Dash. "(But he's still your boyfriend)," he muttered under his breath.

"About these costumes," said Violet. "I think we should wear them under our clothes at all times so we'll be ready for anything."

"Even Jack-Jack?" said Dash doubtfully.

"Jack-Jack must have powers too or he wouldn't have a costume," said Violet. "We need to find out what his powers are."

Dash put his fist up to Jack-Jack's face. "Hey, Jack-Jack, what would you do if I was Count Buddy and I was about to blast you?"

"Gaah!" said Jack-Jack, which meant "Bite!". He bit Dash's hand.

"Yow! You little monster!" said Dash. He looked angry, like he was about to hurt Jack-Jack for real.

Violet started to project a force field, but before she could do anything Jack-Jack morphed into a little red monster and tossed Dash across the room!

Dash used his speed to roll with the throw and got his feet under himself just in time to avoid serious injury.

"Wow!" said Dash. "Cool power, Jack-Jack."

Jack-Jack was still on a rampage. He reached out a hand and touched the nearest solid material, absorbing its properties to strengthen himself for a further attack. Fortunately, all around him was the cardboard refrigerator box. He became a baby of solid cardboard and collapsed under his own weight.

"It's all right, Jack-Jack," said Violet. "Dash didn't mean to scare you. That's a really good super-power. You just need to learn how to control it."

"Googh!" said Jack-Jack, sniffing back a frustrated tear. He reverted to normal baby form.

The children used the box as a dressing room and each put on his or her costume under his or her clothes. After they did this they were all feeling just a little more hopeful. They felt like they might just be able to find and rescue their parents. Maybe their first impression of Count Buddy was wrong and he would be more reasonable in the morning. They fell asleep and dreamed of these wonderful, glorious, and utterly vain hopes. 


	4. Chapter 4, Breaking

(visualpurple - Thank you for the reviews. In the movie, Violet had someone she was interested in, but his name was Tony, not Quigley. Call it dramatic license in combining the two stories.)

Chapter 4

At 5:00AM Syndrome pounded on the door.

"Wakey-wakey children!" he called. "There's lots to do!"

"Huh? What?" groaned Dash sleepily. He hadn't had much rest that night because he had slept on the floor so that Violet and Jack-Jack could have the bed.

The door flew open and Syndrome barged in.

"Come on, there are chores to be done!" said Count Buddy. "Good sidekicks must learn to follow orders. You have to scrub the floors, chop the wood, and paint the living room."

"What about breakfast?" asked Violet.

"Oh, I made you some oatmeal," said Count Buddy. "That reminds me, you'll have to scrub the pots and clean up the kitchen, too."

The children walked down to the kitchen, which was a disaster area of dirty dishes, cobwebs, and mice. There was a pot of cold, lumpy oatmeal on the table. They began eating from the common pot since there were no clean dishes available.

Syndrome's cell phone rang as the Parrs were finishing breakfast. The children couldn't hear the other side of the conversation, but they could tell that he was getting very angry.

"She WHAT?" he shouted. "You've got to keep her away from him! Can't you handle one super by yourselves? All right, I'll fly out there and deal with it."

Syndrome sighed. He told the children, "I've got to go. No man is an island. You stay here and do those chores I told you."

He walked into the next room and got something out of a box.

"A little bird will tell me if you get into mischief while I'm gone, so behave yourselves," said Count Buddy.

He opened his hand and a robotic bird which looked like a tropical parrot flew up and perched on one of the kitchen shelves. Its camera-eyes focused on the three children.

As Syndrome was heading out the door, he called back to the children, "I'm bringing a few of my troops here tonight. Have dinner ready for them by seven o'clock. Buy the food, prepare it, set the table, serve dinner, clean up afterward, and stay out of our way."

"We don't have money to buy food," Violet said.

"Glack!", Jack-Jack added, which meant the same thing.

"Oh yeah, money," said Syndrome impatiently. He reached into his wallet and got a few one-dollar bills, which he tossed on the floor. "There you go."

He stalked out, barking orders into his cell phone as he went.

The Parrs were careful in front of the parrot, aware that it might be recording everything they said and did.

"I'll work in the kitchen," said Violet. "You can work on the floors, Jack-Jack. Dash, you can work on chopping the wood out back."

"But..." Dash started to say.

"If we separate, we can get things done," said Violet.

It proved to be a good plan. The robotic bird could not watch them all at once, so it cycled between them at ten-minute intervals. When he was not being watched, Dash worked at high speed. Jack-Jack morphed into wooden form so he could scrub the floors faster and harder. Violet used force-fields to shift piles of dirty dishes and to capture and eject the mice. She also went invisible and whispered to her siblings as they worked.

"You heard what Count Buddy said this morning? Something about keeping her away from him, and handling one super," Violet whispered to Dash.

Dash nodded.

"I think that he might be talking about Mom and Dad," said Violet. "Maybe Dad's being held prisoner and Mom is trying to rescue him."

"Yeah!" said Dash quietly, as if to himself.

Violet went to talk to Jack-Jack next.

"Count Buddy may have done something to Dad and Mom. It seems really fishy that he was ready to step in and take charge of us the instant our house was burned down. We need to find out where he went today," Violet said.

"Nomanisan," said Jack-Jack.

"Yes, it was funny the way he said 'No man is an island', Violet whispered. "It means 'People need each other'. But it was a funny thing to say. Maybe it's a clue."

Just then there was a knock at the front door. Violet rushed back to put on her street clothes and answer the door. Dash and Jack-Jack also went to the door.

It was Justice Mirage. "I wanted to see how you children were settling in," she said. "Is there anything you need?"

They would have liked to tell her all about Syndrome and his abusive treatment of them, but the parrot had followed them to the door.

"Could we borrow a cookbook?" Dash said finally. "We're supposed to make dinner tonight for Count Buddy and his troops."

"Why don't you come over to my house and pick out a cookbook from my library," suggested Mirage.

The parrot followed them, but it didn't go inside the other house. It watched them from the windows.

Mirage had a huge library, with shelves and shelves of books. She pointed out the section with cookbooks. They quickly found a recipe that looked inexpensive and easy to make: puttanesca sauce.

On their way back, Dash whispered to Violet, "I found another section in the library. A whole bunch of books on Count Buddy. I grabbed one when the parrot couldn't see."

"Why don't Jack-Jack and I go shopping for the dinner ingredients while you work on painting the living room," suggested Violet.

The parrot's surveillance was stretched again. It had to fly back and forth between the two groups, which gave Dash time to read the book. (He didn't particularly like reading, but he could speed-read when he had to.)

By seven that night, the children had all the chores done and had the puttanesca sauce and pasta ready.

"Here we are!" announced Count Buddy, slamming open the front door. He was accompanied by a whole set of strange individuals, all in dark uniforms with light breastplates. One had hooks instead of hands, one was wart-faced, and another was bald with a big nose. Two were women with white-powdered faces. One was large and it was impossible to tell if it was a man or a woman.

Syndrome's troops shot sneering looks their way. "So, these are the brats you're gonna make your sidekicks, Boss?" said the hook-handed man. "They hardly seem worth the trouble."

"They'll turn out all right with my expert training," said Syndrome. "Now children, where's the roast beef?"

"You didn't say you wanted roast beef," said Violet. "We made puttanesca sauce..."

"I'm an important man, and I'm not to be trifled with," snarled Syndrome. "I demand you serve roast beef to myself and my guards."

"No! No! No!" Jack-Jack shouted.

With a roar, Syndrome picked up Jack-Jack and held him above his head with one hand. Jack-Jack began to cry, too surprised and frightened to morph.

"Let my little brother go, you monster," said Dash, starting to rush at Count Buddy.

But Buddy seemed to be prepared for this. He triggered his gauntlet beam again and froze Dash in his tracks, then slammed him into the wall. Then he tossed Jack-Jack toward Violet and caught both of them in another beam. Once again he used the beams to drag them up to their room and locked them in.

"You really didn't tell them you wanted roast beef, Boss?" they heard one of the guards say though the door.

"It's all part of my training," said Syndrome. "Breaking their wills."

"I almost got him," said Dash, vainly trying to keep the tears our of his voice. "In one more millisecond I would have punched him."

Violet hugged her brother to comfort him. "It's all right, Dash. He hasn't broken us yet. Did you learn anything from that book we can use against him?"

"The name of the island where he lives... Nomanisan Island," said Dash.

"So that's what he meant!" Violet said. "That's where Mom and Dad are. I just know it!"

"Yoop?" said Jack-Jack, which meant "How are we going to get there?"

Violet was silent a long time.

"I don't know," she said.


	5. Chapter 5, Book

Chapter 5 

Dash flipped through the pages of the book on Count Buddy, hoping to spot something he missed the first time.

"I guess we need to figure out a way to get this book back to Justice Mirage before she misses it," Dash said.

"Dash, that's it!" said Violet. "I'll return the book and I'll talk to her. She's a High Court judge, so she can call government agents to stop Count Buddy."

"Googh?" asked Jack-Jack, which meant, "Will she believe us? It's a pretty wild story."

"I think she will," said Dash. "She's a smart, cool lady."

"I need to get out of this boarded-up window," said Violet. "Jack-Jack, can you do that strong monster-form again?"

Jack-Jack concentrated and became the little monster. He was able to pry loose a couple of boards with little effort, enough for the very-thin Violet to squeeze through.

"Can you climb down all right?" Dash asked. "We're on the second floor."

"I can cast a force-field to break my fall," said Violet. "Then I'll go invisible to keep from being spotted."

Violet tucked the book under her costume so it would be hidden when she went invisible and slid out the window. She looked nervously down at the ground. Was her force-field skill good enough? There was only one way to find out. She jumped. For a terrible instant she thought it wouldn't go up, but her instincts took over and she made a perfect purple bubble that cushioned her landing.

Invisibly, Violet sneaked over to the neighboring house. A front window was still open, so she slipped inside and went down the hall to the library. She replaced the book on the shelves and then went looking for Mirage.

There she was, standing in the doorway of a room with a large computer screen with her back to Violet. Violet was about to call out to her when she heard another voice from inside the room.

"Did you see any sign of super-powers when you monitored the kids through the parrot-cam?" asked the voice of Count Buddy.

"The boy is fast, as I warned you," said Mirage. "Fast-forward and you'll see how much wood he gets chopped in a few minutes while we aren't looking."

"That was a good warning. When I provoked him tonight I was ready to trigger the zero-point ray," said Olaf. "Any other powers?"

"I think the baby has a chameleon-like ability," said Mirage. "Look at about 9:07. When the robot comes in you can see that he blends into the color of the wooden floor for a few frames. I didn't see any powers the girl used."

Violet felt sick with fear and disappointment. Mirage was working for Syndrome, betraying them! She moved closer, hoping to hear better what they were plotting.

"How did it go at the Island?" Mirage asked.

"It was a mess!" said Syndrome. "Those incompetent guards... You know that plane we shot down?"

"Piloted by Mr. Incredible's wife," said Mirage.

"Yes. Do you know who she turned out to be? Elastigirl!" said Syndrome. "She survived the crash somehow and swam to Nomanisan Island."

"Amazing!" said Mirage.

"Terrible! While I was tied up here, she broke into the base. By the time I got there, Mr. Incredible was free and both were running around the island, pounding on my troops, and looking for a way to escape. I had to null-force-ray them both and lock them up again," said Buddy.

"That was a close call," said Mirage.

"Yes, it was. It's not fair that I have to mind two sets of prisoners," said Buddy.

"Why not wipe them all out and be done with them?" asked Mirage.

"You know why!" Count Buddy snarled. "When Incredible thought his wife was dead, he muttered 'At least you didn't get my kids'. I regard that as a challenge. I decided my revenge wouldn't be complete until he sees me triumph as a super, with his kids as my sidekicks. A perfect revenge for him not letting me be his sidekick fifteen years ago! But it'll take a long time to train them."

"You could go ahead with the Omnidroid plan if you just forced the kids to act the part of sidekicks. You could use the baby as a hostage," suggested Mirage.

"Mirage, I like the way you think," said Syndrome. "I'll do it... and I'll even name the new plan after you. Operation Marvelous Mirage will take place tomorrow!"

"After Mr. Incredible sees you triumph and you eliminate him and Elastigirl, you won't need the kids anymore," Mirage added.

"Well, not the boy and the baby anyway. Dash is dangerous with that speed of his. If he tragically dies in combat that will be good publicity for me. And the baby is useless. But I think I'll keep Violet around..." said Count Buddy.

"Why?" asked Mirage.

"Because she's cute," said Syndrome with a leer.

"Cute? She's only 14!" said Mirage with a gasp.

"The younger the better, I think," said Syndrome.

"But, I thought that we..." said Mirage, moving close to him and rubbing his neck.

"'We' were fun, but I'm ready for something new," said Count Buddy. "Now let me alone. I need to log in to the Island system and restart the countdown."

Violet slipped into the room and watched as Syndrome typed the password on the large screen: "ZEUS".

Syndrome keyed in a few commands and a countdown began on the screen. Then he walked out without another word to Mirage.

Violet quietly edged closer to the computer. If only she could get a little more information before Mirage shut it off...

"I suggest you look under 'Omnidroid' and 'Battle Plan', Violet," said Mirage.

Violet gasped in spite of herself.

"Yes, I know you're here. I have good ears and I heard you slip into the room," said Mirage.

"Y-you won't give me away?" said Violet.

"Let's just say I draw the line somewhere," said Mirage. "One place I draw it is being thrown over for a younger woman. I can't help you openly, but if you find any information you can use, go for it."

Violet sat down and the computer and scanned though as much information as she could, as fast as possible because she had to get back and warn her siblings. She saw how Syndrome had lured retired supers to his island, killing them to perfect his Omnidroid. Her parents were now both listed as "Captured", not "Eliminated", fortunately. She read through the information about the Omnidroid and how Syndrome planned to use his gauntlet controls to defeat it. She read about how the gauntlets worked.

Enough. She had to get back to the other house. She was wondering how to get back in the window when she saw her siblings had made a rope out of pieces of torn curtain. She tugged on the rope. It seemed to be fastened firmly onto something. She climbed into the window.

Then Violet saw what the rope had been attached to. It was on one hook of the hook-handed guard!

"I can't see you, but I feel you there holding the rope," sneered the hook-handed man. "Welcome back, little girlie."

Before she could drop the rope and evade him, he blasted her with a knockout gas gun. She fell to the floor into blackness.


	6. Chapter 6, Baby

Chapter 6

When Violet recovered consciousness, she discovered that she was bound by metal spheres around her hands and feet, and she was suspended in midair by some sort of electromagnetic field. Dash was beside her, also just waking up. Both had been dressed in smaller versions of Syndrome's black-and-white costume. Violet could see their red costumes had been thrown into a heap in the corner.

"You've been very naughty sidekicks, keeping secrets from me," said Syndrome, walking into view in front of them. Gloating was in his voice. "When I went to check on you last night I found you had broken out of the room, Violet. Naturally I had to knock your two brothers out and set a trap for your return. I suppose I'm partly to blame for being a bit - standoffish."

"You haven't been standoffish, you've been vicious!" said Violet.

"Silence!" said Syndrome. "I can give painful electrical shocks through those manacles, so shut up and listen. I'm giving you a chance to redeem yourselves today. An out-of-control military robot is about to attack the city. Work with me on this mission and all is forgiven."

"We're not co-operating with you!" said Dash. "Where's our brother Jack-Jack? We demand you let him go!"

"Oh dear, where could Jack-Jack be? Let's see..." Count Buddy pressed a button on a control panel, and the whole framework that was holding them rotated to the right. They could see Jack-Jack was suspended out the window in a cage. The hook-handed guard stood beside the window.

"If you really want me to let him go, I will," said Syndrome. "But we're in my tower, thirty feet above the ground. The poor little monkey may not survive the fall, even in a cage. But if you insist-"

"No!" said Dash, "Don't!"

"Please," said Violet. "We'll do anything!"

"Anything?" said Count Buddy. "Even perhaps be my sidekicks in today's performance, er, mission?"

"All right," said Violet through gritted teeth, "We'll do it."

"I knew you'd see things my way," said Syndrome with a chuckle. He pulled a lever on the control panel and released them from the manacles. Instantly, rocket boots on their feet fired up, keeping them hovering with their feet off the ground.

"I control every move on this mission," said Syndrome. "I control your jet boots. Dash, you can't pull any running stunts with your feet off the ground. Violet, you can't make that costume invisible. And if you do anything to disrupt this mission, or say anything but 'Yes sir, Syndrome sir', I'll push this button on my left gauntlet; it will signal my guard here and it's bye-bye Jack-Jack."

The sound of a distant rocket explosion came though the window.

"That's our cue! Syndrome, SynGirl, and SynBoy to the rescue! Up, up, and away!" the villain shouted.

As the three flew through the air toward downtown, Violet racked her brains for an answer. Syndrome seemed to have thought of everything. How could they spoil his plans and save Jack-Jack? 


	7. Chapter 7, Battle

Chapter 7 

Syndrome flew downtown, where a huge, five-legged robot was rampaging. A laser turret projected from the top of its spherical body, firing blasts at the army tanks that were vainly trying to stop it. It scuttled deeper into town, crushing abandoned cars into the road with its enormous four-clawed feet.

Syndrome flew himself and his "sidekicks" above the heads of the fleeing citizens.

"Never fear," he said, "I'll teach that hunk of metal some manners!"

"Who's that?" called one of the men in the crowd. "Dynaguy?"

"No, I'm a new superhero," said the Count with pride. "I'm Syndrome, and these are my sidekicks SynBoy and SynGirl!"

A black helicopter swooped down beside them; inside was Rick Poe with a megaphone.

"Ordinarily I'd tell you to cease and desist. But today we need all the help we can get," Poe called. He nodded to the children. "I'm glad to see you're adjusting to life with your new father and are participating in family activities."

"You're happy to, aren't you, children?" said Syndrome, his finger on the button.

"Yes sir, Mr. Syndrome, sir," Violet and Dash chorused as they had been ordered.

"Good for you!" called Poe. "I'll be watching from a safe distance."

Syndrome flew over to the robot and threw a fake punch, planning to cause one of its legs to detach using a control in his glove. But when he tried to press the remote-control button, he found that his left hand was surrounded by a close-fitting purple force field!

"Cut that out, or I'll call my guards!" snarled Syndrome. His finger darted toward the call button, but stopped when he realized it was on the same hand as the Omnidroid control.

Meanwhile, the Omnidroid had analyzed the situation. "PRELIMINARY ID: SYNDROME, NON-HOSTILE. NEW INPUT: MADE ATTACKING GESTURE. UNKNOWN FORCE FIELD ON HAND. RECLASSIFY: HOSTILE."

WHAP! The leg Syndrome had wanted to detach struck at him and sent him flying. He landed on top of a roof two blocks away, unconscious. His gauntlet was left behind, held in Violet's force-field.

Violet willed the force-field bubble to herself. She put the gauntlet on her own left hand and found the control for the jet boots. In a moment she was able to lower Dash and herself to the ground.

"Good one, Vi!" said Dash. "How'd you find out so much about Syndrome's stuff?"

"No time. We've got to get out of here before the Omnidroid notices us," Violet said.

The laser turret swiveled their way. Violet put up a force field around herself and her brother just in time to deflect a deadly beam. Dash began to run, propelling the force-field ball like a hampster's exercise wheel. Violet hovered in the middle.

The droid leapt after them, only to be deflected by a slippery ramp of ice that suddenly appeared in its path. It skidded and flipped completely over, landing on its "back", but the symmetric design of the robot allowed it to stand on its feet immediately and attack the new opponent.

"Who's that?" Violet asked.

Dash said "That's Frozone, a super with ice powers who worked with Dad sometimes. We've gotta help him."

"First we have to save Jack-Jack," said Violet. "Count Buddy might recover and call his guards."

"OK, hang on to your force field," said Dash. He set off running at top speed, rocketing to Count Buddy's home. They didn't stop when the reached the house, but crashed through the doors and raced up the stairs of the tower.

Jack-Jack was sitting on the floor, surrounded by knocked-out guards. The cage was still hanging out the window but its bars had been bent open.

"Glomph glomph!" said Jack-Jack, which meant "Piece of cake!"

"So now we go back and help?" asked Dash.

"Yes, but not in these costumes," said Violet. "If we beat the Omnidroid as Syndrome's sidekicks, he wins. He's got Mom and Dad and he's only waiting until they see him triumph to kill them."

"What?" said Dash. "He's got Dad and Mom? How do you know all this?"

"It's amazing what you can learn in a library," said Violet.

She went over to the corner where their red costumes had been tossed and picked them up.

"We've got to beat the Omnidroid before Count Buddy wakes up and does it himself," Violet said.

"But can we beat it at all? That thing looked really tough," said Dash.

"I've got a plan," said Violet. "But I'll have to work fast with my left hand, and I'm not left-handed." She explained the plan.

A few moment later, all three were speeding back to the battle zone in their true costumes. Dash ran inside the force-field ball again. Violet hovered in the middle, holding Jack-Jack with her right arm.

Frozone was nowhere to be seen, and the robot was rampaging again. Dash charged up a hill at top velocity, building up enough speed that the three of them launched into the air.

The Omnidroid was good at calculating trajectories. It rotated so that one of its legs faced them and raised the leg, preparing to swat them out of the sky the instant they got into range.

"Now!" thought Violet. She triggered the remote button that Syndrome had intended to use, disengaging the leg from its socket. The leg toppled out of the way, and Violet attached the force-field bubble onto the empty leg socket.

"Now it's up to you, Jack-Jack!" said Violet. She held her little brother up and let him touch the metal surface.

Jack-Jack absorbed the strength of the metal and immediately morphed himself into a small copy of the Omnidroid.

"You have to get into the central core and cut the red and blue cables," Violet told him. "That will shut it off."

Jack-Jack tore into the leg socket, which was slightly weaker than the rest of the outside armor. He crawled down a maintenance channel toward the heart of the machine.

Meanwhile, the Omnidroid was trying to fight back. The curvature of the sphere prevented any use of the lasers, but it used an adjacent arm to smash into the force-field again and again.

"I can't hold this... much longer..." Violet gasped. "I hope... Jack-Jack hurries."

The Omnidroid suddenly chose a new tactic. "LEARNED FROM MR. INCREDIBLE BATTLE: DANGEROUS TO ATTTACK INTO SELF. USE ROTATIONAL FORCE TO EJECT INTRUDERS." It retracted all of arms and started spinning as fast as it could.

Violet and Dash were pinned to the outside wall of the force field by centrifugal force. Inside, Jack-Jack was barely hanging on. But the longer he was in contact with the robot the more power he absorbed. Step by step he advanced.

"Too much... blacking out.." said Violet.

She tried as hard as she could to stay conscious. If she went under, the force-field would drop and both of them would be slung into space!

"Hang... in... there... Sis," said Dash.

Suddenly the machine gave an shudder and shut off. Jack-Jack had managed to disconnect the central power core. The Omnidroid gradually spun to a stop.

Jack-Jack crawled dizzily back down the tunnel and into the bubble, still in mini-droid form.

"That was too close..." Violet gasped, on the point of collapse. She lowered them to the ground with the force-field.

"It was awesome!" said Dash. "We did it! Together we beat the Omnidroid!"

"Gaboo!" said Jack-Jack, morphing back to baby form.

People came running up to them.

"That was just like the good old days of supers!" said one elderly man.

"Who are you kids?" asked a woman.

"We work with Mr. Incredible," said Dash.

"Yes," said Violet, taking a deep breath and standing up straight and proud. "You can call us... The Incredibles."

"Garoogh!" crowed Jack-Jack as the crowd applauded.

Poe's black helicopter landed nearby, and he walked over to them.

"Good work, children. You've done great service for your country. I wish I knew what terrorist was behind that robot."

"Count Buddy was!" said Dash. "It was all a plot to make himself a famous super."

"Aha," said Poe, "In that case, we'll lock up his assets. He won't be able to sneeze without our finding out."

"One more thing, sir," said Violet. "We think our parents are being held prisoner on Nomanisan Island. Could you send someone to help them?"

"You think they're there, but you don't know for certain?" said Poe. "I'm afraid I can't waste our limited funding on a possible wild-goose chase. Sorry."

"Glaaagh!" said Jack-Jack disgustedly.

Suddenly the air turned chilly and an ice-slide appeared out of thin air. Frozone came sliding down it.

"You kids saved the city," he said. "I tried to fight that monster but it kicked my butt. If there's ever anything I can do for you..."

"We could use a place to stay for a little while," said Violet quickly.

"My place is yours, compadres," said Frozone.

"I'll gladly transfer their guardianship to you temporarily," said Poe. "Until something more permanent can be found."

"Hey Frozone, do you have lots of cool super stuff at your place?" asked Dash.

"Well, I hope you like lots of snakes," said Frozone.

"Snakes! Wow!" said Dash.

"I'm a herpetologist in my day job. My powers make cold-blooded critters sleepy and easy to handle."

As Frozone transported them across the city on his ice-slide, the Parrs children had the impression that their misfortunes was finally over, that Frozone might be able to help them find their parents and put this nightmare behind them. And you, dear reader, may wish to imagine this too and cease to read these unfortunate tales. Because their impression was entirely wrong...


	8. Book the 2nd, The RapTile Room

Thanks all for the encouragement to continue. 

Delorean 88, I changed a few first and last names here and there to fit SOUA better. In the movie, Violet's friend's name was Tony, but here he's Quigley. Lucius Best has become Monty Best, and so on.

As always, the characters belong to Daniel Handler and Pixar, not me.

* * *

Book the 2nd of A Series of Incredible Events The Rap-Tile Room 

Dash chattered excitedly all the way to Frozone's home.

"That was sooo great!" Dash said. "Did you see the way Violet and I combined our powers and did a rolling force-field ball! And the way Jack-Jack ripped into that robot was awesome. What a team!"

"We did pretty good," Violet said. "But you don't have to keep telling him over and over."

"Goolbah!" agreed Jack-Jack.

Frozone created an ice slide up onto a back-alley fire escape. From there, he led the way into his high-rise apartment.

"Honey, I'm home!" he called. "And, er, I brought a few guests."

Silence was the only answer.

"I guess she went out," Frozone said. "You kids hungry?"

The Parrs realized they hadn't had anything but a lumpy oatmeal breakfast more than a day ago. They nodded, stomachs growling.

"Let's see what we have in the fridge. How about some coconut cream cake?" Frozone offered. He served them all large slices.

Dash devoured his in a moment. Looking around the kitchen for something more to eat, he spotted a note that had fallen to the floor. In an instant he rushed over to it, picked it up, and began reading it aloud.

"Monty," Dash read, "I told you when you spoiled our time together to go fight that robot 'for the greater good' that I'm the greatest good you're ever going to get. You need a lesson by not getting any for a while. I've gone to my sister's."

"Hey," said Frozone, his skin flushing a darker brown, "That's a private note from my wife. It's for me, not you."

"Sorry," said Dash.

"Your name is Monty, Mr. Frozone?" asked Violet. "Pardon me if I shouldn't ask, but you look a lot like Monty Best, Dad's bowling buddy."

"The same," said Frozone, removing his mask. "I've known your family for ages, secret identities and all. But now that you're supers too, I'll tell you a secret. We weren't really bowling. We listened to police reports and secretly fought crime."

"We heard that," said Dash.

"Mom and Dad were arguing about it one time," said Violet. "But now they're both in big trouble. Do you know anything about what happened the last couple of months? Somehow Syndrome got on Dad's trail."

"I don't really," said Monty. "After your Dad and I had a close call in a jewelry store, getting mistaken for burglars after saving people from a fire, we laid off the superhero gig. I hadn't heard a word from him about any trouble."

"We've got to get to Nomanisan Island and help them," Violet said. "Syndrome is holding them prisoner there!"

"Gaazoom!" said Jack-Jack, meaning "And we'd better hurry!"

"I'm game for an expedition to Nomanisan Island," said Monty. "It's somewhere in the Pacific, so we'll need a fast jet. I know an old pilot buddy of your mother's, Gustav Snug, who might fly us there."

Frozone got on the phone with Gustav. From what the Parrs could hear of the conversation it didn't seem to be going well. "Elastigirl already borrowed your last plane to go looking for Mr. Incredible?... Well, how are you going to get it back unless we go out there and get it?... There's really no other plane?... Aha, that could be just what we need!... Could you call him to the phone for a minute?"

Frozone conversed a few more minutes in a low voice.

"We're in luck," he said. There's a guy at the airport with a fast jet who's willing to do a charter flight to Nomanisan. At a very reasonable rate, too."

"Perfect!" said Dash.

"Geem geem," said Jack-Jack, which meant, "A little too perfect."

"While we're waiting for him to come over, want to look around the house?" asked Monty.

"Sure!" said Dash. "I wanna see the snakes!"

"Follow me to the Reptile Room," said Monty.

It was a large room with green glass windows, full of cages with rare reptiles of every kind. The children saw a fat toad with two wings coming out of its back, and another that looked like a church with stained-glass eyes.

"Back here is a new snake I discovered," said Frozone. "I've decided to name it the Incredibles' Deadly Viper, in your honor. Here, have a look." He popped open the door of a cage that filled the back of the room.

Jack-Jack crawled over and put his head inside the cage. Instantly, a huge black snake slithered up and bit him right on the chin!

Dash and Violet gasped, but Jack-Jack seemed pleased rather than scared or hurt. He morphed into another Incredibles' Deadly Viper. The two slithered around together, hissing to each other in snake language.

Monty laughed. "The 'Deadly Viper' part is a misnomer. It's the most harmless creature in the animal kingdom."

After they put the snake back, Monty said, "Let's have some fun while we're waiting. Come on, this way."

He led the way to a smaller room full of sound equipment.

"Here it is, kids," said Frozone. "I love rap music, but it bugs my wife. So we covered the walls in acoustic tiles so I can play all I want without bothering her. I call it my Rap-Tile Room."

He put on some music and grabbed a microphone.

"My name is Frozone, I'm cool as ice,  
So you criminals take my advice,  
Before you act you better think twice,  
It's not just ice-cubes I can slice and dice."

"Whoa, that's cool," said Dash. "Let me try!"

"It's not as easy as it look," said Frozone. "Better take this rhyming dictionary just in case."

"My name is Dash, and I am fast, umm.."

"If you race him you'll come in last," chimed in Violet.

"Yeah, and you're going to get passed!" said Dash.

"Goo goog gah!", said Jack-Jack. (Which meant "You sure will get sassed!")

Violet went to the mike next, a little nervous.

"My name is Violet, I turn invisible..." she said, then realized she was really stuck.

"She tries to rhyme, but she's just miser'ble" Dash put in.

"Gaah gog!" said Jack-Jack (Which meant, "That one was risible.")

They all burst out laughing, forgetting their troubles for the first time in a long while. I wish I could tell you that they lived happily ever after, but it was not to be. There was a knock at the front door of the apartment.

Dash and Violet ran to answer it. The man at the door had a shaved head and no eyebrows. His glittering eyes seemed strangely familiar.

"Hello, my name is Stephano. I'm the guy with the plane. I'm, uh, an Italian man."


	9. Chapter 2, Ringer

Chapter 2 of Book the 2nd Ringer

Dash stared at the man in the doorway for a second. "Count B-"

Violet nudged Dash hard in the ribs before he could continue.

"What my brother means, Stephano, is that we're counting on you to get us to Nomanisan Island as quickly as possible."

Stephano gave Dash and Violet a suspicious stare.

"Yes, please remember I am your only chance of getting to the Island," Stephano said. "If you annoy me by calling me by the wrong name or telling your host unpleasant stories about me, I might withdraw the offer, or maybe even get careless with this knife and perhaps drop it on your baby brother's foot."

They suddenly noticed the large, sharp blade in his hand. It had a high-tech look, with several buttons on the grip. There was no doubt in the children's minds that it was more than it seemed, just as there was no doubt in their minds that this man was Count Buddy in disguise.

Jack-Jack had crawled up next to them while they were talking, and the menacing blade was aimed at his left foot.

Just then, Monty Best walked up to the door. Since this was his home and he didn't want to give his secret identity away to a stranger, he had taken off his costume.

"Come in, Stephano," said Monty. "As I told you on the phone, I want to help these children look for their parents since they did such a great job in saving the city from that monster robot... Hey, is that a knife?"

"Oh, you caught me being a mentor," said Stephano with a chuckle. "I was just showing these nice children that it's dangerous to play with sharp objects."

"They're pretty good at looking after themselves," said Monty coldly.

"Quite so, quite so," said Stephano. "Well, shall we be on our way? You told me you were eager to get to Nomanisan Island as quickly as possible."

"In just a few minutes," said Monty. "I need to pack a few things. I'm a herpetologist. An isolated island like Nomanisan is a great place to look for new species of reptiles."

"I'll help you," said Stephano quickly.

When both had left the room, Dash turned on Violet.

"Why did you cut me off, Vi? We should've fought him!" Dash exclaimed.

"Because he's our only way to Nomanisan Island to find Mom and Dad," Violet said. "He really does have a jet. I heard him tell Mirage he flew out there and back the day we were doing chores."

"So we just play along with him?" Dash asked.

"Until we can get the drop on him. Right after we land at Nomanisan, I hope," Violet said.

"How can we warn Frozone?" asked Dash.

"I don't know," said Violet. "Syndrome isn't letting him out of his sight for an instant. He'll be too alert for me to sneak in invisibly and whisper a message."

"Vipa!" said Jack-Jack.

"Good plan, Jack-Jack," said Violet. "You morph into an Incredibles' Deadly Viper again and crawl into the Reptile Room where they're packing. You can carry a message written on your back."

Dash sped around the front rooms for few seconds, looking everywhere for something to write with. He came back with a magic marker. Jack-Jack morphed into snake form.

"What shall I write?" he asked Violet.

"What about just 'IMPOSTOR'? That's only eight letters and it will fit on Jack-Jack's back." said Violet.

Dash wrote 'IMPASTOR' on the snake. Jack-Jack crawled rapidly away to the Reptile Room.

"I don't think you spelled that right," said Violet.

"Monty will get it," said Dash confidently.

A few minutes later, Monty and Stephano came out, carrying a large box. Monty smiled and winked at them as he passed. Apparently he had gotten the message.

The Incredibles, Monty Best, and Stephano/Syndrome got into a taxi and drove to the airport where the jet was waiting.

"There's a completely automated robotic pilot on this baby," said Stephano after they had boarded. "Just a moment and I'll set it to take us to Nomanisan."

"Frozone, this is our chance!" said Violet in an excited whisper. "We can attack as soon as the autopilot is set."

"What are you talking about?" said Monty.

"Didn't you get our message?" asked Dash.

"Yeah, and it made me smile. 'I'M PASTOR', it said. Pastor Troy is a favorite rap artist of mine, too," said Monty.

"No, we meant Stephano is an impostor! He's Syndrome in disguise, and.." said Violet.

But trying to correct the communication mistake had taken too long. From the front of the plane a high-tech knife came flying. It stuck itself into Monty's back and he fell face down in front of them.

Syndrome emerged from the pilot's cabin, back in his black-and-white caped costume. He looked even more menacing with his bald head.

"This is your captain speaking," he announced gleefully. "Next stop, Nomanisan Island. Beautiful sunsets, pleasant beaches, and relaxed guardianship laws."

"Why did you kill Monty?" Violet cried.

"There's only room for one guardian while I complete your training as my sidekicks," said Syndrome.

He faced them confidently, gauntlets ready and aimed. The Incredibles felt disheartened. They had led Monty into this trap, unprepared because of a misspelled message. Could they fight this villain alone and win?

The plane streaked through the sky toward Nomanisan Island. 


	10. Chapter 3, Riot

Chapter 3 of Book the 2nd: Riot 

Jack-Jack put out a hand and stroked Monty's cheek.

This seemed to amuse Syndrome, and he went into another grandstanding monologue instead of taking immediate action (as he should have).

"Alas, little SynTot," he exclaimed, "Your poor herpetologist friend is no more. Heh, hah, hoo, sniggle, hee... hey! What are you doing?"

"SynTot" had just morphed into a miniature Frozone.

"Gleegh!" said Jack-Jack in triumph.

As Syndrome rushed forward the floor beneath his feet became a patch of slippery glare-ice. He skidded, losing his balance for an instant.

That was enough of an opening for Dash. Racing along the top of the seats to avoid the ice, Dash ran behind Count Buddy and struck the forward emergency exit door with a hard, super-fast kick that forced it open.

"FORCE-FIELD, VI!" Dash yelled, running against the howling air-pressure wind which was suddenly sucking everything out of the plane.

The instant Dash reached them, Violet put up a force field which anchored the three of them in place and held in a little of the air.

Syndrome, however, was not anchored down. The wind sucked him right out of the plane! The children heard him yell, then a shredding sound as something caught in the jet engine.

"Is is he dead?" Violet asked.

The three worked their way forward, breathing from the emergency oxygen masks which had fallen from the ceiling. The wind had stopped as soon as the air pressure in the plane had equalized with the outside.

They looked out the open emergency exit. There was no sign of anyone out there. Then suddenly, a hand reached up from below the door level and grabbed Jack-Jack! It was Syndrome, keeping pace with them with maximum jet-boot thrust. He flew beside them, out of reach, holding Jack-Jack in one arm.

"Pretty slick!" he yelled. "I nearly bought it back there when my cape got pulled into the jet engine, but I tore it off in time. Now, let me back in or I drop the brat!"

"Gloomph!" said Jack-Jack, which meant "No, you don't!"

Jack-Jack went through a fast series of morphs. First he was a ball of fire, absorbed from the nearby boot-jets. Then he was a heavy metallic baby, absorbed from Syndromes metal gauntlets. When Syndrome loosened his grip, Jack-Jack became the "little monster" and grabbed onto Buddy's bald head, then worked his way down along his back, clawing as he went.

But in monster form Jack-Jack had trouble with his temper and judgement. He went too far when he tore off Syndrome's rocket boots. Both the villain and the baby went tumbling toward the ocean below as Violet and Dash watched helplessly!

Violet thought fast and created a large force bubble enclosing Jack-Jack and one of the rocket boots. She tried to shrink the bubble to bring the baby and the boot together, while also keeping them close to the plane. The forces of acceleration and wind were fighting her and she nearly lost the field completely.

Finally, Jack-Jack was able to touch the boot and absorb its power. His feet morphed into mini-rocket-boots, which enabled him to fly himself back into the plane.

The three Incredibles forced the door closed and gasped lungfulls of air from the emergency oxygen masks.

"We've seen the last of Count Buddy," said Violet. "Now all we have to do is let the jet fly us to the island and rescue Mom and Dad."

Would that it were so! But alas, the unfortunate Parr children were heading for even more dire adventures.


	11. Chapter 4, Return

Chapter 4 of Book the 2nd: Return 

The jet taxied to a stop at the airstrip on the southern beach of Nomanisan Island. To the Parr's surprise, no guards came rushing up, weapons drawn. There didn't seem to be anyone around.

Before they ventured out, Violet took a look in the box Monty had packed. She was pretty sure he had brought equipment for a rescue, not just herpetological equipment as he had told Stephano. The box contained nets, a few small cages, and a microscope. Underneath a tarp at the bottom of the box, she found Frozone's costume. Clearly he had wanted to go into action with them to rescue their parents. She sighed, wiped away a tear, and folded the costume to carry with her.

"Why are you taking that?" Dash asked.

"I'm protecting his secret identity," Violet said. "If the costume is found with him, people will know he was Frozone and that could be hard on his wife. And she may want the costume to remember him by."

"Googh," agreed Jack-Jack sadly.

Suddenly there was a loud sound from the front of the plane. It was the jet's radio.

"Calling the Incredibles! Calling the Incredibles! Do you read me? Over."

The children rushed to the radio. Violet pressed the transmit button.

"This is the Incredibles. Is that you, Mr. Poe?" Violet said.

In answer came a horrible, chilling laugh. "Mwah, hah, hee, hee! No, this is your old Buddy, Syndrome. I survived, no thanks to you. I slowed my fall with carefully-timed bursts of zero-point energy. Then I called my people on the Island to come pick me up."

"You're coming here?" Violet asked with a sinking heart.

"I've changed my mind. After all you put me through I decided you're too much trouble to be my sidekicks."

"You're letting us go?" asked Dash in astonishment.

"Now what kind of vengeance would that be?" sneered Syndrome. "I told my troops to set the self-destruct charges before they left. The whole island is a volcano and I rigged it to erupt if I ever needed to wipe out the evidence in a hurry."

The children heard a loud rumbling outside the window. Sure enough, the island's volcano was blasting smoke and ash into the air. Lava was beginning to pour down its sides.

"Where are Mom and Dad?" Dash demanded.

"You're hoping to find them and share some tender last moments? The family who fries together, dies together, and all that? Sorry, I had my people remove them to a safe distance. After they watch your destruction, I can complete my revenge by killing them, too."

"Grragh!" said Jack-Jack. In his rage he morphed to monster form and crushed the microphone.

The children rushed from the plane. A stream of lava was already flowing onto the beach, cutting them off from the rest of the island!

"Pwane?" asked Jack-Jack, meaning "Can we fly the plane out of here?"

"I don't know how to work the autopilot," said Violet. "The runway's partly cut off by the lava, too. Dash, if I make a force-field ball, can you run us across that lava stream?"

"It's too soft to run on," said Dash. "We'd get stuck."

"Frzz," said Jack-Jack. He tried to call on the Frozone powers he had absorbed before, but all he could do was make a few icicles.

Violet said, "Here, try touching Frozone's costume. It may help you recharge the ice powers."

Jack-Jack held the costume and concentrated. He took Frozone's helmet and put it over his head. Suddenly he morphed into a little Frozone again.

The three got into position. Jack-Jack created an ice-bridge over the lava, Violet formed a force-ball around them, and Dash raced the ball over the bridge before it could melt!

"Hurry," said Violet. "We've still got to find a way off this island before the volcano blows up completely. There's the base ahead."

In their rush to evacuate, Count Buddy's henchmen had left the doors open. Dash ran every which way, finally coming to a system's control room overlooking a rocket launching platform.

Violet went to the console. "I sure hope the password hasn't changed." She typed in "ZEUS" and the control screens came to life. She hastily worked through a few menus.

"That rocket down there is a spare for launching the Omnidroid. It's set for the same trajectory into the city as the rocket this morning," Violet said.

"How can we use that? Send a message for help? It'll be too late," said Dash.

"There's a big spherical space at the top of the rocket for the Omnidroid. I can fit a force-field ball into it, and it'll carry us back."

"We're not as hard as the Omnidroid. We'll be going too fast when we land and it'll crush us," Dash objected.

"I'll think of something," Violet said. "Let's go! I've set it to launch in five minutes. We don't have much more time before the island blows."

Dash ran them to the rocket and they managed to get into place before it launched. Violet found this the most difficult force-field to maintain yet. Jack-Jack formed bits of ice, and Dash rubbed them on her forehead to keep her conscious as she fought to keep the force-field intact against the strong air pressure.

Violet remembered her game of skip-the-waves as they were coming in toward the city. She pulled the force-field ball smaller, enough to come loose from the rocket, while they were still over the water. The ball skipped again and again, slowing a little each time. By the time they reached the beach, the ball had slowed enough that Dash was able to maneuver it to a safe stop.

Violet, Dash, and Jack-Jack collapsed in the sand, exhausted. All of a sudden, the "i" insignias on the chests of their costume began to beep. They jumped up, unsure what to do.

Just then, a limousine pulled up near them. Driving it was a very short woman with thick round glasses, wearing a business suit. She was sitting on a stack of pillows to enable her to see over the dashboard.

"Ah, zere you are dahlinks. I haff activated the tracers in your costumes to try to find you."

"Who are you?" asked Violet.

"I am Josephine Edna Mode, but call me 'E'. I like ze middle name best. I am most famous fashion designer, costume maker for ze zupers."

"You're the one who made these cool costumes?" asked Dash.

"But of course, who else?" said E. "But you look like you haff been through a lot, dahlinks. Best you come home with me."

The three Parrs jumped into the limo, more than a little uncertain if this new guardian would be able to protect them from Count Buddy... an uncertainly which was most certainly correct.


	12. Chapter 1 of Book the 3rd, White Window

Chapter 1 of book the 3rd, The White Window 

Josephine "E." Mode drove them through the security gates onto the grounds of her home. It was an enormous mansion in modern style, on the shore of a dreary-looking lake.

"Velcome to my zummer cottage, dahlinks. Now, I vill need to varn you about zome things in ze house," Josephine told them. "First, ze doors. Never touch ze glass doorknops. Only push gently on ze wood, and ze door vill open."

"Why?" asked Dash.

"Because I am afraid if you touch ze doorknops zey vill explode and ze glass vill go into your eyeballs," said Josephine.

"That doesn't seem like a very reasonable fear," said Violet gently.

"Oh, but it is. I haff booby-trapped zem to do zat myself," said Josephine. "I must alvays watch out for fashion thieves, zo I zet traps for zem. Just ze other day, two fashion thieves came to ze door pretending to be realtors. I drove zem away vith atomic cannons hidden in ze lawn sprinklers!"

"Geep!" said Jack-Jack, meaning "This is a scary place for a baby to be."

The children entered the house cautiously, hardly daring to touch anything.

"I zuppose you must be hungry. Children alvays are," Josephine said. "Come vith me to ze kitchen."

"Oh yes, we haven't had a good hot meal in days," said Violet.

"Vell, I cannot do ze 'hot' meal. I haff booby-trapped the stove to explode if anyone touches it. One cannot be too zafe."

"I think one can," muttered Violet under her breath.

"Cold food's fine with me," said Dash, heading toward the refrigerator.

"Ah-ah-ah!" said Josephine quickly. "Don't touch the refrigerator. It vill fall over on you and crush you flat!"

"Another booby trap?" asked Violet.

"Yes... Imagine a fashion design thief came zneaking in here. Before zey start to loot, zey decide to get a midnight snack. Zen, WHAM! I got zem!"

"Where do you keep the food, then?" Dash asked.

"In zis ice-chest under ze sink. I vill make you all some nice cold cucumber zoup," said Josephine.

As she prepared the food, Josephine asked, "Zo, do you haff any luggage? Any clothes?"

"No," said Violet. "Our house burned down and we lost everything. Then Count Buddy took our only regular clothes. All we have to wear is these costumes."

"Zis is outrageous!" said Josephine. "Tomorrow, ve must get you some proper clothings to wear. Good fashion is ze most important zing in life. But is too late tonight ven you are zo tired. Eat ze zoup."

The children were so hungry that even cold cucumber soup tasted good.

"Now time for bed," Josephine announced. "Tomorrow we do ze fashion."

On the way to the upstairs bedroom, they passed through a living room with a large picture window. Oddly enough, it had been painted over in solid white.

"Why is that window painted white?" asked Dash.

"It looks out onto ze Lackluster Lake, and I cannot stand to be reminded of zat," said Josephine sadly. "Years ago, my huzband lost his life zere to zome nasty lake leeches. He vent svimming too soon after eating, and ze leeches smelled ze food on him. Now I neffer want to look at ze lake again, or even ze little island, Aargh Isle, vere we camped in a cave in happier days."

She shook her head, and sighed. All of them continued upstairs to the guest bedroom.

"Any booby traps in here?" Dash asked.

"No, but be careful of ze toothbrushes in ze guest bathroom," Josephine advised.

"What do they do?" Violet asked.

"You don't vant to know," said Josephine.

As Josephine about to go, Violet suddenly had an awful thought. She turned to the others.

"Do you think Syndrome thinks we're dead? If he does, he might kill Dad and Mom!" she said.

The other two Parrs gasped. They hadn't thought of that.

"E," Violet called. "Is there any way you can get out the word to the media that we're alive?"

"Publicity is what I do best, dahlink," said Josephine. "I will tell zem you are alive and vell and staying vith me." She headed down the hall to the phone.

"Count Buddy will come after us again," said Dash.

"We want him to," said Violet. "We have to make him tell us what he's done with our parents."

The children had a restless night in spite of their tiredness, worrying about Syndrome and what he would try next. And of course, they were entirely right to worry.


	13. Chapter 2, Window shopping

Greetings, readers.

visualpurple: your booby trap worked!

Shocking-Sour: You'll find "Operation Marvelous Mirage" in the early chapters. Not a wedding, but they had to act as sidekicks under a threat to Jack-Jack.

Nini: wait and see.

Thanks Nina Wyndia, Dark Moon Sabbath, ChoFrog09, baudelaireobsesserVFD, and anyone I may have missed, for your encouraging reviews.

* * *

Chapter 2 of Book the 3rd, Window-shopping 

In the morning, after a cold breakfast, Josephine said, "Ze wezzer report zays a big ztorm is comink, zo ve must hurry to ze zhopping mall."

"Thank you for buying us new clothes," Violet said. "We could really use them."

"Ve vill not be buyink!" said Josephine sharply. "Vards of 'E' Mode, to appear in public in ztore-bought clothes? No, ve go to look at ze fashions for people your age. Zen I vill know vhat not to do."

"Gloof!" said Jack-Jack, meaning, "It will be good to get out of this crazy house for a while, anyway."

At the mall, Josphine took them to one clothing outlet after another, gasping and shuddering at the fashion mistakes. The children stayed close to her, a little embarassed to be shopping in superhero suits.

"Vill you look at zat! Ze outfit has a ztriped skirt and a checked blouse! Unthinkable! Ze designer zhould be zhot!"

As they were looking in the store window, a man in a bright green superhero costume approached them. There was a large four-leaf-clover emblem on his chest. His cowl covered the top of his head and a green mask covered his eyes, but the children felt there was something oddly familiar about him.

"Begorrah, if it isn't just the person I wanted to find! The famous 'E' Mode, it is!" he said in a thick brougue.

Josephine said, "Vhy yes, zat is me. And you are...?"

"An Irish superhero I am, Captain Shamrock's the name. But me friends call me Captain Sham for short."

"I know all the zupers. Vhy haff I neffer heard of you?" asked Josephine.

"Because he's a fake!" muttered Dash.

"Ah, I didn't last long in the hero game, Ma'm. My very first mission, me cape got caught in a jet engine and it was nearly the end of me. Lost me leg from it," said Captain Sham. He showed them a wooden left leg.

"Aha!" said Josephine, "Vhen will zey listen to me? No capes, I tell zem. Dynaguy, Stratogirl, Metaman, Thunderhead, zey all died from ze capes!"

"I'm willing to listen, M'am. Now that supers are making a comeback, I'm ready to give it another go. It's just that... this costume, 'tis a wee bit out-of-date..."

"It is a hobo zuit!" announced Josephine.

"As you say, M'am. But with a brilliant, wonderful designer such as yourself helping me, I'd feel a real hero again."

"Vhy Captain Zham, you have ze Irish gift of ze gab. You know how to turn a phrase."

"Aye, and I can flip it over and rub it down. That's if you want me to, M'am." said Captain Sham.

"I know who you are!" Dash broke in. "Take off that mask and I'll prove it!"

Josephine gasped. "You neffer ask a zuper to take off his mask in public! It just isn't done! Please forgiff ze child, Captain Zham. He's been through a lot lately."

Captain Sham bowed. As he did, a paralysis ray concealed in his cowl activated and froze the three Incredibles in place!

"Aye, I forgive the lad," said Sham. "Young folk get excitable sometimes. Now, will you help with me costume problem?"

"Of course, of course! Come vith me to my ztudio and I vill take your measurements. Ta-ta, children. Haff fun looking around ze mall. I vill be back zoon!" said Josephine.

She walked away with Captain Shamrock, oblivious to the fact that the three Parrs were stuck in place.

It was over an hour before the paralysis ray wore off and the children could move again.

"Captain Sham!" snarled Dash. "Count Buddy in disguise again! Why didn't you help me get him, Vi?"

"I wasn't sure at first," said Violet. "Masks are so good at hiding secret identities. That's why supers use them."

"Gleese!" said Jack-Jack, which meant "We've got to save Josephine!"

Using the rolling force-ball trick again, the three raced back to Josephine's mansion. The gates were standing open and there was no sign of either Josephine or Sham.

In the living room they found the white window broken, as if someone had crashed through it and fallen into the lake below. Taped to the window was a note. Violet read the note aloud:

"To whom it may concern: I cannot go on. Grief over my late husband has overwhelmed me. I leave Captain Shamrock in charge of everything. Children: as my last act I have made you three outfits. Use them well. Signed, Josephine Mode."

"That note's a total fake," said Dash in disgust. "Syndrome forced her to write it."

"Ooofits!" said Jack-Jack, which meant, "Look at those strange outfits!"

Standing in a row by the broken window were three clothing dummies, one for each of their sizes. Apparently these were three civilian outfits Josephine designed for them.

"There's something strange about this," said Violet. "My outfit has a pinstriped skirt but the blouse has a check pattern. At the mall she said a designer who mixed checks and stripes should be shot."

"Yeah, and look at mine," said Dash. "Solid colors except for these socks with a stupid pattern on them."

"Argle!" said Jack-Jack.

"Yes, Jack-Jack those are argyle socks," Violet said. "And your clothes are puffy all over except the chest. It has a caved-in look."

Dash blurted out, "Maybe these mistakes are a message!"

"Checks... argyle... caved in," said Violet slowly. "Check Aargh Isle Cave!"

"The cave she told us about where she and her husband used to camp. That's it!" said Dash.

"She must be hiding there," said Violet.

"But where's Count Buddy?" asked Dash.

"He'd expect us to come here and read this note, and lately he's been trying to kill us, so..." Violet started to say.

"Trahp!" said Jack-Jack.

And then... the house exploded all around them.


	14. Chapter 3, Wishy Washy

Chapter 3 of Book the 3rd, Wishy-Washy

Two things saved them when the house exploded. The first was that they were all wearing the virtually-indestructible costumes that Josephine Mode designed. The costumes deflected most of the blast, leaving them with only a few scorch marks on the backs of their heads. The second thing was that force of the explosion sent them through the already-broken window. Perhaps that wasn't such a good thing, because the house was a long way above the lake.

Dash's super-speed reactions kicked in, and suddenly all he debris falling around him seemed to freeze in midair. There were boards, pipes, bricks, and bits of furniture everywhere. To him they seemed like platforms in a 3D maze, like the ones in Mario games he had played and easily beaten.

He began leaping from one falling object to another. He reached Jack-Jack first, then Violet. At the speed he was going he was able to pull them along with him, though the extra mass made it harder to change directions. Several times he misjudged the jumps and nearly smashed into chunks of debris.

Finally he leaped a patch of floor that was just barely attached to the foundations by a few shaky beams, and the extra pressure made it start to give way. Dash made one final mighty leap through the front door of the house and onto solid ground. Behind him the rest of the building collapsed and fell into the water.

"Goowow," said Jack-Jack, which meant "Wow!"

"There was an explosion, and the next instant here we were," said Violet.

"Nothing to it," said Dash.

"Now all we need to do is find a boat, figure out how to sail it, and go rescue Josephine," said Violet.

"It's a snap," Dash said, full of his own success.

It wasn't a snap. The had to evade several of Syndrome's guards who were roaming around the town. At the docks they had to fight the one who could have been either a man or a woman. When they finally got the ship going, a huge storm was going on and they could barely see to navigate to Aargh Isle with all the rain and tossing waves.

At last they made it to the cave on Aargh Isle, and went inside to look for her.

"Josephine! E! Are you in there?" Violet called.

"Here I am, dahlinks. Haff you brought any groceries?" Josephine called back.

"Groceries? Why?" asked Dash.

"I vant to liff here for a few months, then zneak out of the country and ztart over vith a new name," Josephine said. "That vey ve have no troubles vith that awful Zyndrome. You come vith me, too."

"No!" said Violet. "We have to confront Syndrome. He has our parents!"

"Best I stay in hidink, anyvey," said 'E'.

"No, you have to challenge that fake suicide note he made you write," said Violet. "He'll steal your money, costumes, and any weapons you have stored away and be worse than ever."

"You hate design thieves, don't you?" said Dash. "Syndrome is the biggest one of them all."

"Very vell, I come back vith you," said Josephine. "But I ztill think this is big miztake."

As they started to sail back, they noticed many dark shapes converging on their boat.

"Ze leeches!" cried Josephine fearfully. "I hope zat none of you has eaten anything for ze last half-hour."

Jack-Jack gave a guilty burp and tried to hide a banana peel. The water began to boil with hungry leeches all around them.

Then they noticed larger boat headed their way. Suddenly, it shot a bolt of crackling energy across their bow!

"Zyndrome, vith vun of my atomic cannons," said Josephine. "I told you, this was big miztake." 


	15. Chapter 4, War

Chapter 4 of Book the 3rd, War 

"Heh, hee, haw!" giggled Syndrome. "This is more like it. I can attack you from here all I want, but you can't get to me!"

He fired a shot directly at the three children. Violet raised a force-field, but when the beam hit she cried out: "It's too much energy! I can't deflect it all."

After the next blast hit, she said, "My shields are getting weaker. I can't keep this up for long."

Dash asked, "Vi, do you still have the Frozone suit? Maybe Jack-Jack could make an ice bridge."

"No," said Violet. "I left it in the bedroom this morning."

"Gleep gloop!" said Jack-Jack in disappointment.

"Do zomethink!" Josephine demanded. "Zat last zhot damaged ze boat, and ze leeches vill get in!"

The leeches were attacking the damaged sides of the ship. Soon they would bore through and the boat would sink.

"Having a little leech problem?" Syndrome taunted. "I was smart enough not to eat anything today, but I guess you weren't."

He fired another shot at the Parrs. This time, Violet's shield was weaker and a little of the beam broke through. The children fell to the bottom of the boat, stunned. Josephine was still unhurt because so far the blasts had not been aimed at her.

Syndrome called to her, "Mode, you don't have to be in the same boat with them"  
"I don't?" Josephine asked, surprised.

"Work for me and I'll spare you," Count Buddy said. "I could use your super-costume technology."

"It is an offer I cannot refuse," said 'E'.

"Exactly," said Syndrome. He moved his boat up closer. "I'll let you come aboard and then I'll finish them off."

Josephine said, "I zee you are vearing ze new green costume I vorked up for you ven I thought you vere Captain Zham. But vhat is that on ze chest?"

Syndrome chuckled. "I wanted my old white-on-black 'S' logo, so I just patched it on."

"It clashes vith the green. You haff no fashion zense," Josephine said.

"And you have no common sense!" Syndrome snarled. He raised the atomic cannon, ready to shoot Josephine at close range.

WHAM! An oar wielded by an invisible hand came down on the atomic cannon's delicate firing mechanism, smashing it. But one last burst of energy from the weapon struck Josephine a glancing blow, sending her flying into the water far from the boat. Leeches headed her way, and whether she survived or not is an open question... but it's not very likely.

"I know you're there, Violet," said Count Buddy. "How did you get across when there's still a couple of yards of water between our boats?"

Violet had formed a large force bubble right below the water surface, temporarily displacing the leeches and giving her a way to walk from one boat to the other, but she knew not to answer aloud and give away her position.

"Won't talk? Then I'll just have to blast in a wide spray," said Syndrome. He started to fire his gauntlets.

Without thinking, Dash rushed to her aid. He suddenly realized that he was running on the water surface, too fast for leeches to bite. In an instant he was on the other ship, punching Syndrome as hard and fast as he could.

"Is that the best you can do, boy?" Syndrome taunted. "My new costume is as damage-resistant as yours. I can barely feel your punches."

Back in the other boat, one of the leeches jumped over the side and tried to bite Jack-Jack. One touch was enough for him to absorb its abilities; Jack-Jack morphed into a giant leech. He seized the banana peel in his mouth and dove over the side of the boat. The leeches never attacked their own kind, so this giant newcomer passed unchallenged. A horde of them followed the smell of food, however.

Jack-Jack leaped up at Syndrome and bit him on the bottom, rubbing the banana peel into the villain's costume as he did. He hung on as hard as he could even though the costume made it hard to grip with his teeth.

Syndrome tried to grab Jack-Jack and wrestle him off, but the leech form was very strong and slippery. Count Buddy lost his balance and fell into the water. The leeches that swarmed around him had tinier teeth, sharp enough to penetrate the weave of his new costume.

"Yeoooww!" Syndrome yelled. He came shooting up out of the water covered with leeches. Jack-Jack dropped off into the boat, but all the other leeches hung on.

Count Buddy had had enough. He rocketed away with his jet boots, yelling, "I'll get you next time, orphans!"

Jack-Jack touched the broken atomic cannon and morphed into a working miniature of it. He fired at Syndrome and shot him out of the sky. Buddy dropped into the lake and did not reappear at the surface, at least as far as the children could see.

Dash was jubilant. "Good shot, Jack-Jack, you got him!"

"Goomb!" Jack-Jack replied with glee.

"Did you hear what he just called us?" Violet asked.

"Some stupid supervillain taunt," Dash said. "Oaf-heads, or something."

"No," Violet said. "He said 'orphans'."

"But that would mean..." Dash said. "NOOO! He was lying. He had to be lying."

"He may not have been," said Violet, her voice breaking.

Jack-Jack began to wail.

* * *

Epilogue 

At this point I stopped monitoring though our satellite, the Big-Eye-In-The-Sky, and began to type up my notes. They deserved some privacy in their grief.

Just then, my brother entered our secret headquarters behind the big clock at City Hall.

"How does it look?" my brother asked. "Will they make good recruits for the Volunteer Freedom Defenders? We need more members to revive our superhero organization."

"This isn't a good time. They're still in shock over their parents," I said.

"Why don't you help instead of just watching them?" my brother asked.

"There's not much I can do as The Lemon. I only have the power to turn things sour. You could do more with your athletic powers," I said.

"I might just do that. It's time for The Jock to get into action again," my brother said.

"Careful, brother. I don't think we've seen the last of Syndrome, and he's very dangerous," I warned.

"I can take care of myself," Jock said.

"I'm going to write up their adventures and get them published. If the world knows of their heroism it will help us supers to get established again," I said.

And so I turned back to my writing. The world needs to know of these incredible but unfortunate children, and I, The Lemon, will make sure that happens.

But for now, with all due respect...

THE END


End file.
